Just as i thought that things were about to pick themselves up & get better, it all came crashing down again. At 7.22am ,21st October 2009, my grandma gave away her last breathe. My grandma who has been the person who looked after us ever since we were born.

First i had to lose him, the person who i loved truly & deeply, & now this.. I do not want to sound selfish because at the same time i am glad God has took away her life, so she won't suffer anymore. But what truly breaks me apart is seeing my grandpa. He keeps saying why god never took him instead of her. Why she left him just like that..
And yet again, my heart was broken.. All because i thought he would be there for me on this day. But again, he broke me into pieces & left me just like that.. without any words.

My eyes are swollen, i can't stop crying. I've got no voice,neither any appetite. I do not know what else to do, but to just stare into the blind space & imagine life was just like before.

I do know if I'll ever be alright, because the impact of losing 2 people you love dearly is just too damn strong. And i am but,just a lifeless doll right now.. Waiting for my puppeteer to come tug at my strings.


Semoga ALLAH S.W.T mencucuri roh arwah nenek ku. Selamat tinggal nenek. Yana selalu sayang nenek. =_(