ALL DONE! the Links, the About Me section. All donnneeee~!! Well not exactly, cause i'm still missing 1 picture for the links section. I just can't seem to find anymore pictures of this little lady anywhere. Not in her FS profile or even her blog. So yeah, i guess i've just got to wait till her sister passes me her picture. Oh yes, in case you haven't notice.. My legendary "Jumping Turtle" is no longer here. *sobsob* Why? Because when i put it in together, it looks as if my poor turtle is being imprisoned inside a small square box. And it looks soooooo pitiful, all caged up inside. LOL. (& the colours in here all ade kene mengena dgn org-org tersayang. Go figure!)

Baby, from the moment we became one, i made a promise to myself.. to be true to you, to try & make things work no matter how bad we fight. I know i was being a bitch just now when i unleashed all my angst at you,when i said all those words to you & in Myspace. And i'm truely & utterly sorry. Quarrels & disappointments will always be a part of our lives till the day we die, & i'm sorry for taking it so hard. I was missing you too bad, to see that i'm hurting you more & more.
Baby, for all i know & care, my eyes only long to see you. My heart only long to love. My hands only long to touch you. You've blinded me with your Love, till at times i forget to take care of it. Those other people out there can never make me laugh or smile, like the way you do. They can never even match to how you treat me & love me. Believe me when i say, that you don't have to worry about them taking me away from you.
Baby, you are all i think of ever time i open i my eyes, every time i close my eyes. You are all i ever wanted by my side. & NOTHING can ever change that. I love only you & nobody else.
i SWEAR baby.

I LOVE YOU HADIDI FADZLY. ONLY YOU. =_(

Things btwn the Love & i ? Not going well at all. In fact we just had a huge argument. Reason why? JUST BECAUSE OF A SMALL ISSUE I HAD WITH MY MUM & BECAUSE WE WERE MISSING EACH OTHER!! I don't think i wanna elaborate much on it for fear of bursting into tears again. But i'm just sad to see both of us hurting each other this way.It wasn't even our war to begin with but we ended up being the casualties. I'm just disappointed in the boy for walking away and leaving things hanging just like that. I know i may have said some hurtful things to him, & i'm sorry. But for you to just walk away & leave things hanging? You really broke my heart.

I wished this tears could stop. Cause it's hurting so damn bad. =_(

& this has got to be my most favourite purchase of the day. It's a checkered cardigan that looks like a 3/4 cardigan when you put it on. & it's absolutely CUTE. =)

There's actually quite a few more tops that we purchased but i think these pics are enough to show what i'm actually talking about.
Oh gawddd.. I think i'm turning into a girly-girl! What with all these tops & somemore i'm back into doing make-ups. Sumpah aku tak tau what's happening to me. I just hope it won't be too much of a shock for BbyLove. Because he said he just loves to see me like when i used to be the tomboyish type, with berms, tee & skate shoe. Entahlah kann. We'll see how his reaction will be when the next time i meet him.

I guess that's about it. I'm now waiting for the boy to call. Till next time then!

BbyLove is in quite a foul mood today. All because he has been working an 11hour shift just now & he's gonna have to do another 11hour shift later on too. I pity the boy. He's only 18 but he's living his life as if he's 30. But on the other hand, it's quite a good thing too. So he'll learn to stop depending on his parents.

Headed out to JP with mummy & Baby Girl just now. Just went around here & there trying to find stuffs. But irritatingly enough, we couldn't find what we wanted. Sometimes i find it a waste for the government to rebuild some malls or buildings into something grander with hopes that people in SG are spoiled for choice. But disappointing isn't it when it only ends up that you can't even find a fcuking headband in a place so BIGGG! And because i couldn't find what i was looking for, i ended the day with a blowout with mummy. Sumpah irritated tau kalau you keep going in & out of shops only to be greeted with disappointment. Grrr. So yes, today was a day full of disappointments.
& now i'm back at home, otf with the boy ( who is being very crankyyy) & blog-hopping from blogshop to blogshop just for fun. I'm frankly quite bored already & i dnt know what else to do.
Ahhhhh. I think i'm gonna clean the house or something before i smash my computer. LOL.
Till next time then!

Btw, check out my song. It's an old favourite of mine when i was young. The lyrics just hit me straight in the heart. So enjoy. =)

I am feeling very very stressed out right now. cause it seems that whatever decisions i'm about to take has already seemed like a bad decision even before getting it done.. I've got an interview tomorrow & it already has gotten the Love to worry unnecessarily. & the plans for me to further my studies? He doesn't seem so approving of that either. I know he has my best interests in heart & that he's worried that i'll run off with some other guy.. but hey, you've gotta have a little faith in me Love. I know it's gonna be time consuming & we'll be meeting each other less, but that doesn't mean that it's the perfect reason for me to run away to some other guy right? I've told you this before & i'll gladly repeat it again. "I WILL ONLY LEAVE WHEN YOU GIVE ME A REASON TO." Soooo what are you so worried about? I know.. i know.. Even i am worried by the thought that you'll be continuing your studies next year, but at least i know it's for the best. for OUR future. But please Baby.. put a little more effort in trusting me.

I've got to do this now. Or else i will never do it. I need your support on this Baby, & i hope you'll be there behind me every single way. It's gonna be a tough journey, but TOGETHER, we'll make it through. Just think of what we have planned all these while, coming true. Just think Baby. Please.

My head is killing me & i feel like i'm about to cry anytime. Because if
only planning has already made it so tough, i wonder if i'm able to make it all
the way through. All i know is i've got to do it. I can't disappoint my mum
again. I've done enough to her & now it's time for me to release her
pains.

a msg from BbyLove. TOUCHING KANNNNN?! Awwww. I swear he is the utmost sweetest guy i have ever had. And he is definitelyyyyy a KEEPER! *grinning from ear to ear*
I'm just simply in awe right now. And i can't stop smiling awayy. & to top it off! I'm seeing his face live on webcam right now! My night couldn't get any better than this.

PG Baby Dee is currently at my house now, "borrowing" my comp. And i've been blog hopping quite alot from just now. Just out of boredom actually. I haven't got quite much to update, so don't mind the short post.

I've just got to say this to Eesya. Thanks for insights on things bey. I really appreciate it. Like i said previously, things have gotten way out of hand. And i'm sick & tired of beng the "bad" one. Still, i find it pretty ridiculous when said that it was "HER" time. Whatever it is, i've moved on. & i've let things be. Even BbyLove has kind-of "FORBIDDEN" me to get soo involved any more. Because all i keep doing is coming to him with tears. *sulks* Oh well.. Life's been fair. So lets not ask for more trouble. I'm done with much things said, & i don't think there's a need for me to do much anymore.
Gonna go watch PRISON BREAK. & to call BbyLove and say i miss him over & over again. =D
Till next time then!

Oh wait! Check out this video! It's AWESOMMMMEEEEE!

simply WOW.

Friends. Some that sticks with you till you're grey & old. Some you meet & know, even if it's for a short time. I've gained myself quite a number of close friends whom i've already regard as family. I've even lost quite a number too. But it is with their memories that kept me laughing & crying the whole day through, reminiscing the good & bad times. And even if some of my friends have turned into my enemies, i still thank them. Thank them for entering my life, for teaching me what i should & should not do. But just like everyone, not every friendship goes through a smooth course. You have arguments, confrontations & even hatred amongst one another. And i am not one to deny that even i have troubles with some of my friends. But in some cases, i just do not understand why it happens or why they are acting that way. At times, all i can do is, just let it go & smile. Pretend like it doesn't bother, when truthfully it's hurting like hell.
But for 1 thing that is sure, I'm just not the type of person to keep quiet when a friend behaves rudely. Like for instance, something happen today that really irked me.

I know you miss him & you want to spend time with him, but what makes you think that we don't miss him too? And for you to go sulking like that is just way too much, Actually, i don't mind if you want to sulk, but for you to ignore us when we call you countless of times is just way too rude. I mean, would you like it too if you called someone over & over again & they would just ignore you? I know that we maybe had made you feel left out just now, but sulking over that matter? Oh godd.. Too childish. But what can i say, that is who you are & i know there's nothing more i can do about it. Like you've said before, we are all in the "ape nak jadi,jadi" mode.. sooo, i guess you're right. I'm too sick & tired to get involve in any of this anymore. If you think you're the only one with problems, then guess again. All of us have problems, but at the very least most of us don't drag it along when we're meeting up. Cause we know that every meetup is precious & to spoil it is just not the way to go. So please, don't go around saying your head is full of problems, when each & every one of us has them too. I don't know what else to say to you, but lets just hope that you do something about ur attitude. I mean, even i'm not perfect & i know i've hurt some of you at some point, but i try to make up to it. I try to change & make things better for everyone. Haiz. I am still here for you if you need someone to talk too. But i've already sensed that i'm not needed. So hey, whatever...

I seriously think that there is no more point for me to go on & on. Cause i've realised that people only need you when they are in deep shit or in sadness. But when everything else goes well, you're just not on their minds anymore. Whoever said life was easy, was certainly a big time idiot.

I wishhh..

CLICK TO ENLARGE!

Yayyyy! My Baby loves me for me & not for SEXXX!! Wooooohoooooo!! Hahahaha.
That's the way uh huh, uh huh. I like it uh huh uh huh! Hahahaha.

(mak dia pun nk jugak feeling2 main pasir. Hahaha)

(ni part kirekn nk step macho uh.. -__- layankan jeeee.. )

Ah nie lah gmbr2 neoprint yang nie anak dua ekor ajak aku ambik. Sorry lah kalau tk clear. =D

BbyLove is on the other line crying because he's scared that i'll leave him.. *scratches head* Sumpah aku tak tau ape yg trigger dekni to think like that. 1 moment we were fine, then suddenly he gave me this long msg, confessing his love to me. Sungguh weird nak mampos, i tell you. But in a way, it is really really kinda cute. I mean, where else can you get a guy who cries just because he's missing you?! Sungguh terharu tau sayaa.. What DianaLush said was true, "HE'S DEFINITELY A KEEPER!" =)

Oh shit! PG Dee is waiting for me to call & hang out. Hahaha. Busy sangat lah saya nie.. Lols.
Till next time den. =)

To P G DINA,

First & foremost, let me ask you this;
WAS THIS ISSUE ABOUT YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE?
Secondly;
DID I EVER SAID I WAS GOING OUT OF P G?! Did i?!
So now, why do you have to make matters so big? Why do you have to make it
ALL ABOUT YOU? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO GET SO EMOTIONAL ABOUT THIS?!
I've tried my very best to understand you & truthfully speaking, i
don't understand you right now. Maybe it was what Eesya & Kykie said on
their blogs but why do you have to make the decision to go out of PG?
And since when did we turn our backs on you?! Your assumption on these
things are really way off.. Ever wondered why we never "bother" to let you know
about your mistakes? Because of you damn EGO. Do you think you ever listened if
we corrected you? We've tried Dina. We did try alot of times. But you still
decided to stick to your own decisions. So what else is there for us to do? But
that certainly doesn't mean that we've stopped being there for you. So why oh
why are you being so emotional now?

Dina, if you said you feel left out then what about the others? We all had
our "LEFT-OUT" moments, but none had made such a big deal out of it. Bey,
consider yourself lucky that they didn't ganged-up against you. They're just
tired of your attitude, NOT YOU.

I think it's time you & me sit down and talk. JUST YOU & ME. I need
to know what goes on in that thick head of yours. I really do. Haiz.

AKU NAK LAKI AKU LAAAA... =(

Susah lah sangat nak explain kat korang lahh. Hahaha. So yes, i got back into my old hobby of collecting this Folding Fans. & i know for sure that this is not gonna end anytime soon because i have always been the type to go on a frenzy once something caught my eye. But each frenzy would never last a lifetime. It would always last about a few months, and after that... all those precious thing would be collecting dusts somewhere inside my room. But these time round, i'm falling much much deeper in love with these fans. Sungguh lawa lah siol. Hahaha. So now, my latest frenzy! JAPANESE FOLDING FANS!

Dearest P Gs,

I know i've said it time & time again that i'm backing out from PG. Or
that i'm going MIA. But don't worry, i'm not going anywhere. I'm just here to
put my foot down. We've got quite a few issues on ur hands, some about ALL of
us, some about each other. Truthfully speaking, i'm quite sick & tired of
always being the so called "MATURE" one amongst all of us. Yes, i'm the oldest
but that doesn't mean that i don't need anyone at any time. I still do have
feelings afterall. True, i don't reveal much stuffs to most of you babies, but
being a family means we should have understand each other by now. Yes, we do
have meetups & gatherings but things have changed quite abit. And i just
can't stand the way things are. So now, i'm here to let you guys know that i'm
letting my so-called post as the "DIRECTOR" down. And i want each & every
one of you to nominate someone you think is the next best candidate for that
title. No i'm not joking anymore. I think it's time i free my mind of all these
things, all these plannings & shits. So yeah, votes up people! =) Oh yes, kalau sape2 yg krg tau tk baca blog aku, sila smpaikn msg nie k.