I'm killing myself with all these sad thinking & tears. I just don't tink i'm able to sit at home anymore cause it will only make me think more & more about all these shits that's happening to me.
Do you know how much it hurts knowing that ur best friend is not longer a phone call away or that u will now have to go a day without msging her or disturbing her sleep? It fucking hurts so damn bad. And i think i've dried up all my tears.
I was looking at pics & i came across this pic of me and her. The very 1st few pics taken while we were still considered just "friends". While we still learning to trust each other. And tears just came. Soon after that, i was browsing through all our pics and crying like a mad woman. Tsk.It has been a long time since i cried this hard.. And the last time i cried this hard was when i found out what Haziq had done to me. Haiz.
I still remember the days when i could call her up anytime, even at 4am in the morning, and she would pick up my call and hear me crying like and idiot when she was supposed to be working at 7am the next day. She would grumble when she picked up the phone but would immediately turned soft the moment she heard me crying. And she would even meet me up, even if it was just a little while. I was too harsh on her, nvr giving her a chance to explain or to even say anything. But what was i supposed to do. I was at my living's end and she left me hanging. I was so heartbroken. Haiz. And for me to treat her this way is just so damn unfair to her..